Saturday, September 16, 2006

Peace and self acceptance.

This article by Geneen Roth deals with peace and self acceptance and weight loss.

I think, however, that her words have a direct correlation with unschooling.

"I often hear a variation on this statement: "If I'm not intolerant of my shortcomings, how can I ever expect to change them?" The truth is, real change only happens when you're kind to yourself. "

And ~ "The only way to learn the difference between self-indulgence and self-kindness is to experience what self-kindness feels like. Declare it "Be Kind to Me" day, and get out there and start treating yourself as if you deserve every good thing. Because, in fact, you do. "

It is my belief that a child who grows up with kindness becomes a child and an adult who is kind.

Spare the rod and spoil the child does not seem to work here.

Love and laughter and prayer and sacraments and explanations/discussion, while being authentic, does work in our house. So far.

"Not with blows, but with charity and gentleness must you draw these friends to the path of virtue." St John Bosco

As an aside ~ Last night, my children remembered the times that mum "lost it". What is worse is that they remembered these times in front of a priest!

Now, I *don't* hit my kids but I *have* lost my cool in my mothering years.

So, to be brutally, honest - I don't always live by these words. But they are my goal.

Peace and self acceptance.


Ladybugs said...

Wonderful, Leonie.

I try to parent gently as well...and today, I don't think I did very well in a tense moment.

Your post is a wonderful reminder.

Hopefully, with my flub-ups, God will show my children that He is Perfection...and that I'm merely on the road...with them.

Fr. Benedict M. said...

Don't worry Leonie, I don't think the priest was too fazed by hearing the stories of when you've lost it... well certainly not after the French lesson!

Leonie said...

Maria, I know exactly where you are at - boy, I don't lose very often but when I do it is always memorable. :-(

But I have to be kind to myself while being kind to my kids. And to dh. :-)I'll say a prayer for us both.

Fr - don't remind me of the French!!! Why can't my kids pretend to be perfect when you are around! lol!

Fr. Benedict M. said...

now that wouldn't be much fun would it!! St. Francis reminds us that : We are nothing except what we are before God.

Cindy said...

Hi Leonie,

So nice to read Fr. Benedict's comments, too.

I liked your post. On weight loss, health, I have also spent some time trying to understand it from a more spiritual route. I used to be caught up in the body image stuff.. and like a good challenge... so it is finding a balance. I have decided now to follow good health rules as best I can (eat right, exercise, sleep) and let God shape my body how he will, though it would be nice to be an easy size to simplify shopping!

I am still working on this, (as I, too, got into eating disorders ie living on celery and diet Koolid in college to be skinny) and want instead to be healthy and natural)

I appreciate you sharing your insights as I can relate quite often.

We have all lost it. I am losing it less as I get older... and more importantly I know as I have grown in my faith. Still far to go, but the days when I had no faith at all it was really all about ME. Whew, that is tough to be your own god. Still slip, but at least I know what to aim for. :)

Talking with friends on the same journey is one of the biggest gifts.

Just listened to an awesome talk by Deacon Bob McDonald on Anger and Forgivness. Wonderful! What anger is, how to deal with it, etc.
I thought I was listening b/c someone else I know needed it.. but it was me. :)

Cindy said...

Oh, and--- I agree so much on the kindness. Wonderful post.

Leonie said...

Wow, Cindy - very insightful - "I thought I was listening because someone else I know needed it...but it was me."

I find it truly amazing to see that you and I have often been through similar things ( eg the unhealthy eating bit). You are right - "talking" , even on blogs, with friends on the journey is a real boost.

Leonie said...

Fr - you are right. Thanks for the quote from St Francis - I just need to work on what it is that I am before God. IYKWIM? :-)

Fr. Benedict M. said...