Friday, April 24, 2009

Groove is in the Heart

That song by Deee-Lite.

By groove, though, I mean getting into a groove. A rhythm.

We have rhythm..routine... in our days and weeks..and months...And we have been finding our groove again, post Holy Week and the Octave of Easter.

Finding what works for us now. Some time together. Some time alone. Some work, some chores, some formal work, time with people , activities. Reading through the liturgical year. Books, movies, games. Oh, and did I say work and people?

Today at a Kumon coffee meeting, someone introduced me as that Shire Leader, that Supervisor, who has seven kids and homeschools and writes and does volunteer stuff at church and elsewhere. And who never misses a workout.

I cringed.

That's me. And, yet, it is not me.

I don't do it all. I do many things but in dribs and drabs. Some here. Some there. With the family.

Julie, from Bravewriter , describes how this dribbly, drabbly routine can work ~

Some weeks homeschool gets the lion’s share of my attention. Other weeks, my business does. Some days, I give in and make spring crafts for hours (like yesterday) and let the whole kitchen go to heck. On those days, we eat pizza for dinner. Other days, I make a wonderful chicken stew and set the table with candles, but don’t wash any clothes. Some months, a writing deadline (like my MA thesis last April) means the family has to pick up my slack in the meal-making, food-shopping, clothes-washing department so that I can write unfettered.

...All bets are off when your business and your kids’ education are both at home and both fall on you! That’s a situation few people in your life will know or understand. There really is no time when you are all alone and free from the competing pressures of dogs with vet visits, phone call polls, television drone in the background and the eternally hungry tummies of children, teens and home-working husbands.....

The bottom line is that more and more of us need to work to pay for life ....If you are at this place in your life, your family can handle it. You just need to be sure that you continue to give your heart and energy to your kids when you are with them. That’s the only way to balance it all out.

Part of finding a groove or a rhythm is learning how to balance things out. Remembering that not everything has to balance out all at once.

Post Easter Sunday, we are finding time for reading about the saint of the day. For trying to fit in more masses, for me, during the week. For doing kumon work. For paid work. To do some maths, some Latin, some French...Searching through Science books and texts for ideas...To mess around, and to see friends.

But not doing all these every day.

Many things but not all-at-once.

Even our seemingly disorganised or very busy days have a hidden and stable routine. Priorities are set according to family need and resources, time, energy, allocated accordingly.

Yesterday was a busy work day for me and, accordingly, a time for formal work for kids, for work at Kumon for all. Today, we had mass and meetings and hang out time for kids..time for me to see a friend..for youth group..for Anthony and dh to have time..for cooking..for Kumon..for blogging..for gaming.

The two days were very different. The skeleton of the days, however, remains the same. Chores,my personal prayer time or mass, workout, family prayers, saint of the day, reading, meals, remembering time for family and each other and friends. What we do in the larger blocks of time, is the flesh on the skeleton;these are what make the difference, the daily changes.

We don’t have a schedule, but a flow, a flow to our family’s daily routine. We don’t dictate bedtimes, chores or television times but we do talk about the day. I have a to do list; I live by my diary. We hang out and do stuff; we fit have-to stuff into want-to stuff and into appointments and regular classes and actvities and meetings and work and our parish life.

And every now and then I ignore stuff and just play.

Or I get tired and send myself to time out.

The groove is in the heart. But, then, listening to the heart is hard. Finding a groove, getting back a groove, can be hard. I often try One Thing for re-marking a groove.

2 comments:

molly said...

"Even our seemingly disorganised or very busy days have a hidden and stable routine."

This may become my favorite quote of yours. If you see me displaying it, Know I give all credit to you:)

Leonie said...

It describes our days well - and, I suspect, yours too..It came to me after reading the responses to the unschooling days post at 4 real learning and pondering comments on not learning and un-parenting...I just don't see such things, there is alwasy a hidden, underlying rhythm and stability..ime!